American politics and how they scare me

Hello, Internet, it’s Friday, January 27th, and I am sort of all wrapped up in the Republican Primaries.

WARNING: WHAT FOLLOWS CONTAINS POLITICAL TALK. In cast the title didn’t tip you off, there.

Now, it should be no surprise to anyone who reads this blog regularly that a) I can’t vote in American elections on account of my not being a citizen of the USA; b) if I COULD vote in American elections, I would not be voting for the Republicans.

So mostly, I just sort of watch in horror as a number of very rich white men over 50 openly exhibit racism, sexism, classism and homophobia and are then CHEERED BY THE PUBLIC.

For example:

Rick Santorum (who once famously compared homosexuality to bestiality, earning his last name a double-meaning bestowed upon it by gay-rights activist and advice columnist Dan Savage):

Newt Gingrich, who is scary because he might actually win:

Mitt Romney, who, in 2008, I was praying would not win these primaries, I am now rooting for with my whole heart:

But, friends, there is hope! Meet Vermin Supreme, Democratic presidential candidate and possible magician:

If I were a voting American, I would seriously consider that man (and his majestic chapeau), when casting my ballot.