Humour in the small things

Good morning, Internet, it’s Friday, October 14th, and the EHM is back.

This time around, the EHM is made all the more acute by the lack of a schedule or any real responsibilities. I have lined myself up with several social responsibilities, but I don’t have any professional deadlines that I haven’t invented for myself. And the deadlines I set myself are the deadlines that are least likely to be met.

So, I’m attempting to maintain a regimen for myself:

8:00am: Time to get up!
8:10am: Clothed! Make tea.
8:30am: Have breakfast.
8:45am: Play with the internet for a few minutes.
9:00am: Email/phone tasks and other things around the house.
9:30am: Writing time! If writing is being stubborn, read something.
12:00pm: Lunch.
1:00pm: Gym!
3:00pm: Visits with friends and/or coffeeshop time (more writing!)
5:00pm: Sometimes work. Otherwise, food and then friends and/or a cultural event and/or more reading.
BY 12:00am: Asleep.

However, so far my routine looks far more like this:

8:00am: Time to get up!
8:10am: No, seriously. Get up.
8:20am: Are you up yet?
8:30am: HA! Up! Housecoat and slippers time!
9:00am: Breakfast
9:15am: Play with the internet.
11:00am: Oh shoot. Um… Write something.
11:15am: Give up on writing. Pick up novel.
1:30pm: Why am I so hungry? Oh right – LUNCH!
2:00pm: Can I go to the gym right after eating? Don’t you need to wait for an hour before exercise?
2:15pm: I’d better wait till 3 just to be on the safe side.
2:20pm: Clothe self? Play with the internet.
3:00pm: Gym! (author’s note: this is only true about 60% of the time. In many cases, skip directly to 5:00pm)
5:00pm: Sometimes work. Otherwise, friends and/or food and/or cultural events and/or napping.
9:00pm: Feel guilty about how nothing got done.
12:00am: Unable to sleep due to napping. Read and/or internet for another few hours.

So. Still work to be done on that.

In other news, my loop of laundry has gone from 7 loads every 3 weeks to one load every 2 or 3 days. This may sound like a sign of maturity – like I have finally come to terms with the fact that laundry is never going to be ticked off my to do list and I might as well just make it part of my every day. It might sound like that. But it isn’t.

What has happened is that our dryer has broken. And we live in a clothesline-less world (and besides, it’s getting to be winter – it rains a lot), so we hang our wet laundry around the house to dry. For example, yesterday morning, I washed my sheets. Now my living room looks like this:

Now, for some irony:


That is the dryer that’s been living in our front hall for… how long? Forever. It has become a fixture in the front hall. I don’t remember what the hall looked like without that dryer.

The dryer is from the apartment upstairs. When the current tenants moved in, they already had a washer and dryer, so the ones that had been up there got moved down here. The plan was to put them in the basement, where the laundry happens. But the house is old, and they didn’t fit down the stairs. So they got dumped in the front hall.

We sold the washer. But the dryer remains, unsellable, rising to its new calling as a table-near-the-front-door. (If you’re wondering, the stuff on it in that picture are: a set of car keys, a box of cold meds, and a PastaSaurus – a pasta server in the shape of a dinosaur head – which I purchased in New York a couple of years ago. Do not ask why there’s a kitchen utensil on the dryer in the front hall. The answer will only disappoint you.)

So, to recap:

But the dryer doesn’t fit down the stairs. It’s not plugged in or vented. We live in a house that is way too old to be playing games with humidity.

And so, for the present, I will continue to do one load of laundry, hang it up in the available hanging-to-dry spots, wait till it’s dry, and then do another load. Maybe, by the time we solve the dryer issue, I will have become a one-load-every-few-days kinda woman. And then I can claim to be responsible.

In other news, the Festival of New Dance continues this weekend, the St. John’s International Women’s Film Festival is coming up next week, and the easiest way to buy tickets for either of those things is at the LSPU Hall.

Also, tomorrow morning I am recertifying my CPR! Hurray!

More next week!